Love Italian Style
The Secrets of My Hot and Happy Marriage
By: Melissa Gorga
In recent weeks I have had the pleasure to sit down with Melissa Gorga and surprise guest, hubby Joe Gorga at the Freehold, NJ Barnes and Noble book signing for Love Italian Style…
I have had the amazing opportunity to speak with them both before, ( as my Live Out NJ video interviews highlight ) but in an unanticipated twist, I was really able to see them interact with fans and help document their moments with fans at length-
Before diving into my exclusive interview with the hot couple, envied by millions, I have to share how beyond gracious they were to every fan who waited to capture a glimpse and few moments of their time. They went out of their way to extend ample time with each person and really get a chance to connect with every fan.
I have been lucky enough to work with many celebrities of all walks of life at showcases, events, red carpets, etc. and do not be fooled by the glitz and glam, for most individuals in the entertainment business this is a job just like anything else. When camera’s turn off, or when interviews come to a close, time is up and people shift gears. Melissa and Joe displayed none of that throughout my 5 hour duration with the couple.
I am very thankful for my extended time with the couple and being able to watch them relate and have fun with their fans.
Joe Gorga, my God, Joe Gorga, what’s not to love? The man is full of fun and heart. He hams it up for the crowd from time to time but they cannot get enough. It is so charming and endearing to see him love the attention but to also take it with a grain of salt. He has pure shine around him and you can see deeply that he is a rare breed of man. It is sometimes hard to argue who is luckier??!!
Then you have Melissa… I mean do I need to even go into how beautiful she is? She embodies class and elegance, yet you can see her warm heart brighten the room, while still being completely down to earth.
When you see them both together, it is so obvious that any negativity around them is jealousy or a complete misunderstanding of what they stand for. Beautiful individuals, beautiful couple, beautiful children, and beautiful hearts. That’s right, I am just going to keep saying beautiful.
Now back to the task at hand:
There is a reason young Italian women are raised to be strong and independent but still maintain old school values and traditions. I know to some it may seem to be contradictory, but I can assure you it is anything but. We do it all, share it all, and that is our fulfillment. As women we want to feel treasured but have our men act and feel like men. Now that does not mean to be a passive homemaker who does nothing but “serves” a man, it means providing the environment that a man wants to be a provider for. Most importantly providing for each other and for the family as a whole. Through honesty, support, loyalty, and passion, we dive into loving Italian style…
JESSICA: The last time we spoke you were in the process of writing Love Italian Style. It was at Montville’s Posh Fashion show, hosted by you and Kathy (Wakilie). I had the pleasure of interviewing Joe on camera and it is evident he not only supports you but completely adores you. It is clear you are doing something right! What is the Major motif or key point you are trying to get across with this book?
MELISSA: Treat your man like a King and he will treat you like a Queen. People fail to realize a King can move one square at a time, while the Queen can zip across the board…Who is to say the King means better than the Queen.
JESSICA: I love that! And that is precisely where I was going with this…I knew we were going to understand this take on it. You have taken a lot of criticism for that comment. I personally feel like people got a bit carried away because they do not understand exactly how it was meant. How would you like to address that?
MELISSA: Thank you! Exactly. This book is me sharing my story, my values, and my relationships. It is the foundation for how we operate and why this works so well for us because that is the top question I was being asked from women and other fans. I do not expect everyone to understand nor am I telling anyone that this is how they should handle their own relationship or be in their own lives. This is just what works for us and I stand by that. I am happy and he is happy and our family dynamic thrives this way.
JESSICA: Understood. Do you think the context in which it was taken warrants the extremity of negativity that has surrounded it? Or at risk of sounding hypocritical?
MELISSA: These are some Barbara Walters type questions, you go girl! ( She chuckles in a playful tone ) To an extent I can see why some may find it hypocritical but again I have always been a working girl. I paid my way through school and always worked hard. I continue to work hard. This has never been about catering to your every man’s wish and being nothing but a servant. This is about figuring out what your partners needs are and wanted to be the person that is able to do that for each other because that is how I believe to show him my love everyday.
JESSICA: ( At this point I feel pretty comfortable to throw in what I like to refer to as my a**hole sense of humor) It’s like I always say…we are all feminists till the check comes! LOL ( Joe, Melissa, and I all have another chuckle. They completely understood I was trying to make them laugh at the criticism.)
Both genders in 2013 are so independent I found it refreshing to read about your take about scaling it back a bit and how men and women can show affections differently.
MELISSA: Thank you. That was my ultimate goal to offer an insight that had worked so well for long-lasting marriages and what I have learned in my own experience because Jesus knows it is not always easy!
JESSICA: This mindset do you believe it is a generational thing? A New Jersey thing? Or a cultural thing?
MELISSA: Def. an Italian thing! Not to say other cultures do not have some of those old school values and traditions, but growing up it is what I was exposed to and learned from within the Italian culture.
JESSICA: Okay! So let me throw this one at you…I am 27 years old, single, my first CD was Jagged Little Pill, very hardworking and independent as most girls around my age have to be…What advice would you give to young ladies on the cusp of discovering themselves and their potential life mates with new attitudes, and technologies shifting the dating world so much? And do you ever worry about Antonia entering the modern day dating world as it can clash so much with some of those traditions?
MELISSA: Well…
JOE: Hold on I will take this one, Antonia isn’t dating till she is in her 30s!
MELISSA: (ha-ha) Joe always teases…But yes, I worry with certain things, but Joe has also done a wonderful job of putting the fear of God in poor Antonia when it comes to boys so we aren’t quite there yet for thinking on those terms! Lol But to answer your other question, I understand that modern day dating, with social media, and easy access to many different forums of dating makes things very difficult. I do believe though it is a good test for weaning out the frogs so to speak. As long as women value themselves in that world, they will get a valuable in return.
JESSICA: On a fun note- what is a typical date night like for you and Joe?
MELISSA: Well me and Joe try not to separate to much period, as you can see he is here with me right now. But we like to just have dinner maybe dancing…Any kind of alone time where we get to share and connect. That is what feeds our passion. We just have to work on making that special time for one another to show that appreciation.
JESSICA: Last one, I promise. And I say this with love…How the HECK are you juggling all this? Wife, Mother, Author, T.V, Music, Endorsements, Appearances, maintaining how hot your bod is!?? I say this woman to woman, it’s borderline annoying, you are making us look bad! LoL
MELISSA: (Ha-ha) Thank you! Thank you! It certainly is tough to make time for it all. I would be lying if I made it seem perfect. However, it is about priorities. Being a mother and wife will always be my number one. It is the most important thing to me and it is where my happiness will always lie. In order to do that sometimes some of my other passions have to take a backseat and that is okay with me. I am truly blessed to be in a situation which allows me to live my dreams in so many different ways. I would never have been able to do that if I didn’t have Joe! He has given me my family, and made all my dreams come true!
JESSICA:
Thank you so much for your time! I love the book and I really believe it to be such a relatable and relevant read for how we all support and love in our relationships. You guys rock and God Bless!
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